My Wedding Day

Day 5 is everything about my wedding day, which was the 8th of February 2013.

For the last day of Wedding Week, I thought I'd do a Wedding Day Recap. I've read race recaps out the kazoo (and re-read the good ones) but I've never really seen a Wedding Day Recap.

So here we go. Everything you wanted to know (and probably loads of random stuff, too) about the day I married that lovely man with an accent.

(I won't go through all the random getting ready stuff.... But anything amusing or funny that happened I'll tell you!)

I woke up super early that morning. I didn't even set an alarm, but it was clear no one else was awake. (By the way, me and my entire family were staying at Alex's parent's Bed & Breakfast. So when I say no one was awake, I seriously mean no one out of the 15+ people at the house were awake. And Alex was staying there, too, but in a separate room so we wouldn't see each other. He was leaving early to get ready anyway.)

There was a feeling in my stomach that I immediately thought was nerves. I thought, "Oh, I'm finally getting nervous! It's my wedding day!!"

The more I sat there thinking about it, the more I figured out I wasn't nervous..... I was hungry. (Is that normal??) I couldn't leave to get food though because Alex hadn't left! It was agreed the night before that I would stay inside my room until he left.

(He finally left and I ate breakfast in case anyone was worried.)

We'll fast forward to the actual wedding now...

Part of the "Civil Ceremony" process is meeting individually with the registrars to talk about the ceremony and go over the scripts. While talking with them, they said they've never met someone so calm before. I said "I feel like I should be nervous! But I'm not!!" They were shocked.

We were getting married upstairs at the venue, so I would have to walk up the stairs and wait on the landing until they were ready to play my music.

The assistant registrar looked at the time and said "Oh you have a few minutes to wait so just relax."

Not even 10 seconds later (not an exaggeration!), my music starts playing. She gestures for me to finish walking up the stairs and I'm like "I THOUGHT YOU SAID I HAD A FEW MINUTES!!!!!!!!"

Oops.

I immediately burst into tears. Full on ugly crying.

(By the way I picked "Waiting for the lights" [an instrumental piece] from the Disney movie Tangled. Don't judge. It was perfect.)

I walked down the aisle with my dad and my uncle on either side of me. I know that's not customary (trust me, it caused lots of drama, so you don't have to tell me twice!) but it's what I wanted. I didn't care what everyone thought. It was my wedding! If I said I wanted to walk down with 2 penguins by my side, I would have wanted support! 

Anyway, my dad and my uncle had to drag me down the aisle. I kept stopping because I didn't want there to be pictures of me bawling my eyes out. And they both said "you're not going to stop crying, so just keep going." They were right.

I didn't even see anything. I didn't see any guests or where we were. I didn't even hear any music. I saw Alex. And he was laughing at my ugly crying face. I didn't even see what he was wearing. He could have worn a banana costume and I wouldn't have noticed. I was too busy mentally telling him "I know I look a hot mess. Don't judge me. Don't laugh because it's making me laugh. Oh and btw I love you."

I'm crying and smiling. I know, it's not a good look for me.

What you need to know about me is that when I cry in front of people, I laugh. I get really uncomfortable and just start laughing. It's very strange. But it made all of our guests laugh because I couldn't stop laughing and crying at the same time.

The registrar had a hard time keeping the guests quiet because they were laughing (in a good way!) at me laughing and crying. She said "I can tell this is going to be a funny one!" 

When it was my turn to speak (the vows) I was fine, because I was concentrating so hard on remembering what she said and what I had to repeat. When Alex spoke, that's when I lost it. Because I had nothing to concentrate on. I had time to remember "OMG I'm getting married!" 

Sneezing? No, just laughing and crying!

I'm really happy that our guests and registrar were so patient. I was afraid all my blubbering would annoy them, but they understood my very strange ways.

Part of a civil ceremony is signing the paperwork in front of everyone (and having the witnesses sign). Guests weren't allowed any pictures during the real signing, but they brought a fake book for us to sit at and pretend we're signing. I found that hilarious. Like, "we're signing stuff! How romantic!"

Alex isn't really signing.... He's a good actor though!

Finally, we were husband and wife!

And could eat our amazing cupcakes!!!

Everyone came up to us downstairs and said that the ceremony was exactly like our personalities. I was slightly embarrassed over my ugly crying, but everyone said that if the wedding didn't go like that, it wouldn't have been our wedding! 

We had our wedding meal (which was a roast dinner) and I wore about 7 napkins on top of me so I wouldn't spill anything on my white dress.... It worked though!

After that, it was time to party!

I was so excited for all of our other guests to arrive. I was on such a high from the day that I couldn't wait to share it with everyone!

(Little did I know how much my cheeks would hurt after smiling so much!)

We were taking loads of group pictures with family and friends. Alex wanted a "Stag Do" (Bachelor Party) picture with all his friends that went with him. They got their shot and then wanted one with me in the picture. They said they'd pick me up and lay me across everyone's arms.

So on the count of 3 they started to pick me up. Well, I think only about half the guys were paying attention, because my legs and torso went up up up.... and my shoulders and head plummeted to the ground! Imagine my surprise! I'm getting dropped on my head at my own wedding!

Luckily, my head never reached the ground. I was too busy holding up my strapless dress to notice. Unfortunately, there are no pictures of the event (that I know of! Some lazy person might upload one to Facebook soon. I will keep you posted!).

This was the Plan B picture for when the first one didn't work out.

We had a blast regardless. And then there was cake in my face.

 

Purely an American tradition, didn't you get the memo, Alex?!


And then we danced!

(All of these pictures look like I'm a pro at making ridiculous faces. I promise I'm normal sometimes!)

I tell Alex all the time that he is a terrible dancer. He IS a terrible dancer! I didn't think it was possible to be that bad. When we practiced our first dance, he was bad. Then when it came for our real first dance, I was a train wreck! You'd think someone sewed my feet on backwards. I blame it on the fact that I couldn't pirouette or leap in my dress, you know, show off me real skills. But I actually can (well, that's questionable nowadays) dance!

That was our wedding day. Like I said yesterday, it went by so fast. I know planning it and budgeting for it and dealing with guest drama is hard and overwhelming. But trust me, it's worth it! It was the best day of my life by far! He's my best friend in the whole world; I couldn't imagine spending the rest of my life with anyone else.

Thank you for tuning in to Wedding Week to see my adventures, advice, and across the pond comparisons! I hope you've enjoyed reading about it; I know I've enjoyed reliving it! 

The Best Advice That I Take No Credit For

Day 4 is all about advice for the big day.

This is called "the best advice I take no credit for" because that's exactly what it is.

It's advice from others that was given to me and helped me so much on my wedding day.

So now, I am giving this advice to you no matter what side of the pond you are on. 

Don't lift a finger

I wanted to go to the venue early in the morning and supervise set up of decoration and stuff. (I'm a control freak, what can I say!!!)

Two of my family members said that they were going instead and that I would stay at home. I was freaking out!! No, I had to go! Obviously the world would end if I didn't go! 

My family literally had to sit me down and say "no, you're not lifting a finger today!" the morning of my wedding. If they could have tied me to a chair, they probably would have. 

I'm so glad they told me no. There was really no point in me going except that I'm a control freak and wanted to do everything myself. The venue was beautiful without my help, and I'm glad I had time to relax that morning.

So seriously, don't lift a finger. Let people help you. You'll be on your feet all day and all night. Take time to sit. I promise you won't regret it.

The only fingers you should be lifting that day... I'm sorry, that was cheesy...

Take in the moments

This was the most common piece of advice, and I can see why. Everything really does happen so quickly. You want to remember and cherish everything. If you feel yourself getting overwhelmed, just stop. If too many people are talking to you, go unwind by getting fresh air outside. It's not worth it getting anxious, stressed, or busy. Take everything in. Act like a guest, not a host/hostess! (To an extent)

We're clearly taking in the moments here.

Don't drink too much

I feel like this is kind of a given, but I guess in England it just had to be said! People will be offering to buy you drinks like crazy, and your first reaction might be to take everyone up on the offer! (Seriously, when will this ever happen again?!) But it's also a looonngggg night. Remember when I said "take in the moments" above? You can't do that if you're drunk. 

Ask for water, too! I know that seems lame, but it's worth it. Again, it's a long night, and it can't hurt to drink water! I switched between wine and water throughout the night. Of course, I would have loved a few pints of cider (I know, I'm a classy bride), but I wanted to have a good, memorable time more than anything.   

That's cake in my face.... And there was zero alcohol involved in this.... Imagine if there was!

 

Ask for help if you need it

Like I said, I'm a control freak. I'd rather do everything myself. But my family had to remind me to ask for help when I needed it. Even help with the little things makes the day go by so much easier, like having a trusting and knowledgeable friend not in your wedding party keep track of your phone (when guests inevitably call because they got lost) or having someone responsible for a spare pair of shoes.    

Don't be afraid to NOT talk to people 

Obviously, don't be rude and blow people off. But literally, the day is all about you, and people will acknowledge that. There were times where it took me forever just to sit down for a hot second because I kept getting stopped by people! It was so nice and the attention was great, but it was also tiring! Don't be afraid to excuse yourself from a long conversation or to say you'll find them again in a little bit.  Or if you've found yourself in a big group conversation, lead everyone to the dance floor so you guys can have some fun!

Or if people keep bugging you, give the Best Man a knife and have him deal with them.... (Mostly) Kidding!

Like I said, the day and night goes by so quickly. It may not seem like it at the time, (seriously, I asked someone what time it was at one point and was like "gahh I'm exhausted and it's only 8:43!!!" I will forever remember that exact time....) but it's over before you know it. So follow this advice and take in those special moments with the ones you love!

Any more advice for the big day?

A Week To Go

Day 3 of Wedding Week is everything I did the week of my wedding!

Most people probably don't do what I did. I was in and out of London multiple times, in and out of the country, re-doing and then re-re-doing the table plans, and seeing more of Heathrow than I ever wanted.

Basically, I was completely ignoring the fact that there were decorations to be finalized, hair/nail appointments to be made, and somethings old/new/borrowed/blue to be found.

Remember when I told you the perks of Destination Weddings? This is where that all comes into play....

My hectic week was definitely not the best strategy by any means. But it's do-able if it's what you want. And if you love being on the go like I do, this pre-wedding challenge may be just for you!!

Here's a little glimpse into all of my fun adventures that I went on the week of my wedding!

Stonehenge

We only live about an hour or so away from Stonehenge, so Alex's parents took my sister and I there.

Stonehenge ROCKS!

It was my third time to Stonehenge. It was Alex's moms first time ever! (And my sister's first time, but that's not too shocking...)

The Making of Harry Potter (WB Studios Tour)

This honestly blew my mind. I am a massive Harry Potter fan and I loved it. My brother-in-law doesn't even care for Harry Potter and he loved it. 

In front of Hogwarts... No big deal!

I'm going to do a full post on this once Wedding Week is over. But honestly, it was one of the best places I've ever been to! (And I've been to the HP park in Orlando.... This is better than that!!)

Day Trip to Paris

My sister was in England for almost 2 weeks, so of course Paris was on our agenda.

Of course we also went to the top!

Our Eurostar train left at 5:40 in the morning, meaning we left at about 3 to get to London. We got back to my house just past midnight. It was a long day to say the least (and 2 days before the wedding! I know how to keep things interesting!) but it was loads of fun!

Day and a half trip to London

My sister and I roamed around London (with me as the tour guide... It's a miracle we're not still lost!) and it was the first time I was completely alone in London without Alex!!

I'd say I was an excellent tour guide, though. I navigated the tube like a champ, and took her to London's hot spots! Of course the shopping at Harrods, Hamley's, and on Oxford street were our favorite part of the day! Seeing Big Ben was great, too!  

(And I can honestly say I took zero pictures while in London. That was definitely a first for me!) 

Endless trips into town/shopping

It's what my sister and I do best! Any moment we had "spare time" we walked into town and shopped.

I'm sorry, what?! Florida State University?! No no no you've got the colors ALL WRONG! #EnglandFail

I think that was the benefit of having a "small" wedding. I had done a lot ahead of time because I fully knew how busy I'd be once my family arrived! I'm glad I had a high pressure week because it took my mind off 1) getting nervous, 2) family drama, 3) trying to keep track of everyone and everything.

If you want to have these adventures the week of your wedding, I'd definitely plan in advance. Don't wake up and decide "I want to go to London today!" Have a plan. Tell your family that plan. If they want to do something different, it's all on them. Obviously your family who have traveled have a plan, too. Some are very independent and would rather do things on their own (or they acknowledge, respect, and accept that you're busy). Some want to monopolize your time. (Seriously, the day before the wedding my dad [who by the way was staying a good 30 minutes from my house] wanted to randomly go sightseeing. No dad, I can't go sightseeing! Stick to the plan!!)

Obviously if appointments and/or "down time" are your priority, make them a priority. I chose to make the most of my family being here. There's nothing wrong with whatever plan you choose to make!

Busy wedding week or would you rather relax?

Traditions Across The Pond

Day 2 of Wedding Week is a Bridal Battle of epic proportions. Just kidding. I like to be a bit dramatic.

I get asked all the time, "What are differences between American and English weddings?!"

I end up babbling for hours on the subject and eventually give up and just say "Google it". 

Sometimes I would ask Alex "is this normal??" or "is this how you do it??" regarding our wedding planning. He would respond, "I don't know, I've never gotten married before!" Thank Zeus and all the heavens he has a pretty accent, because he was seriously zero help at times.

Obviously, American weddings and British weddings have a lot of similarities.

But there were also plenty of differences everywhere, from planning the wedding to the actual ceremony to the party in the evening!

With my experience of planning a wedding in England, this is what I noticed are some major differences between American and English weddings.

(Note: Our ceremony was a civil ceremony, which meant no religion was incorporated or even allowed. Our wedding planning/ceremony is where this list of differences comes from. It may/may not differ from other types of ceremonies.)

Ceremony vs. Celebration

In America, you tend to invite everyone to both the wedding ceremony and the party afterwards. Everything just sort of flows into the next event without more people arriving.

In England, the wedding ceremony is much more intimate. It's really only family and close friends that attend. And they're the only ones who eat a full sit-down meal, as well.

The celebration guests come later. This consists of all of the people from the ceremony, plus other friends and colleagues. There is usually a buffet for the evening guests throughout the night, but nothing like the presentation and elegance of the intimate sit-down dinner.

(Our wedding consisted of about 40 ceremony guests and 120 evening guests.)

The party has arrived! By the way, in no part of the evening was I drunk. I know it appears like I am, but I'm not!

Personally, I like this concept better. I know there's always stress knowing who to invite and "whether you want to spend the money on a meal for your mother's sister's grandchild's stepsister". But for us it was pretty clear who was coming to the ceremony and who would just be coming to the evening celebration.

The only thing I will say is that because of this, we had to have 2 different invitations with 2 different times to arrive. It honestly wasn't that big of a burden, but just make sure you stay organized so you know who you invited to which part!

Location 

In America, you can get married practically anywhere! Getting married on the beach is common where I lived in Florida. All you have to do is arrange someone to come marry you at a certain time. You don't even need to reserve the part of the beach or let anyone know.

In England,  they are much more strict (which I found incredibly frustrating when first planning the wedding). The venue has to be licensed. Because of this, they are also quite pricey.

And also because of this, getting married in a registry office is common.

(Here's where I'm going to sound like a snob. I have no intention of sounding like a snob, but I know I will. It's not my intention to offend anyone, so I'm sorry if I do.)

There is nothing that I wanted less than to get married in a registry office. I felt like Alex and I had sacrificed enough in our 3+ years of dating, and that we deserved not to have to settle for a registry office wedding. (See, I told you. Snob.) Especially when we could get married on a free beach in Florida and have a gorgeous surrounding instead of a stuffy registry office. (Snob.)

I kept telling Alex that I would rather get married in our back garden than a registry office. (Snob.) He just kept saying "you can't do that!" and I didn't understand why! He said it's to preserve the meaning of marriage and I said "bullshit, I don't care."

We ended up finding a lovely, affordable place to have both the wedding and the evening celebration.

But keep all of this in mind if want to get married in England.

Giving notice vs. having a marriage license

I was completely clueless about both of these things to be honest.

In America, you get a marriage license. (Which sounds hilarious to me.... Like a drivers license for your wedding.... Waiting for hours at a DMV to take a test and a bad picture...) I couldn't tell you the first steps of how to get a marriage license.... Good thing I never had to!

In England you "give notice". It's basically giving your intentions to marry. They post your intentions to marry, as well. They ask you basic questions about each other. (spelling of names, birthdays, occupation, very basic things) You can get married 15 days after giving notice and it's valid up to one year.

Carrying a horseshoe 

I've never heard of this custom in America, but I also haven't been to or been a part of many weddings. So I just decided to go with this one. 

I was given a small, decorative horseshoe a few days before the wedding. I opened the box, looked up at everyone, and just said "I don't get it". They said it's for luck. Noted.

Then, when I was nearly ready at the venue, someone handed me my bouquet and the horseshoe. I was like, "what do I do with this??" Finally, someone had explained to me that you hold it with your bouquet. I wish someone told me this sooner so I didn't sound like an asshole the whole time wondering what I was supposed to do with it!

Stuffing cake in each others faces

Purely an American tradition, and I was set on keeping it that way. My husband, however, had other plans....

Nice picture before he went to the dark side...

We talked about it and agreed no caking stuffing. But when the moment came, my American family starting shouting "Stuff it in her face!!!" and like a good in-law, he did.

(I also got the feeling that if I did it to him, some of the older English family would be appalled. Like I would get the "Ugh... Americans..." glare and head shake. I know that's probably not the case. I just felt like that at the time.)

The wedding party was sitting

Alex and I had a small wedding party consisting of 2 people..... His Best Man and my Matron of Honor.

I was utterly confused when they had them sit in the front row (on their respective sides) instead of standing next to us during the ceremony! I thought maybe it's because we had a civil ceremony instead of a religious ceremony that things were less formal. But then I Googled it and it turns out it's normal in the UK.

Something blue, and a sixpence in your shoe

Everyone knows the rhyme "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue" for items the bride wears on her wedding day.

In England they add "and a sixpence in your shoe" meaning an old form of currency.

I didn't do this one. Not for any reason. I could have found a sixpence somewhere (and John Lewis actually sells them for brides at a ridiculous price.... Ridiculous considering what they're worth really...) Oh well!

Oops upside your head

This is a popular dance done at wedding celebration parties in England.

I had never seen it before until it was turned on and I was dragged to the dance floor and plopped on the ground! (in a white dress... classy) It's like a Macarena, Electric Slide, or Time Warp dance... Everyone just knows what to do!

Basically, everybody lines up and links legs while sitting on the ground and you shimmy or clap your hands from side to side a certain way. My freakin' hips and legs were killing me afterwards! Even though you're sitting, you're moving your upper body around so much and your hips take the brunt of the strain. Maybe I'm just out of shape!

Regardless, I don't think my American family participated. Actually, that's a lie. One of my family members stood at the front of the lines and conducted everyone into perfect synchronization! But no one got down on the ground to clap and shimmy with me. 

In the end, both weddings get the job done, am I right? I'm sure there are plenty more differences (Bachelorette Parties vs. a Hen Do, bridal showers, etc.) but these are what played major roles in our across the pond UK wedding!

Anything else you can think of? Have you been to a wedding that was different to your traditions? What traditions did you/will you incorporate into your wedding?? Have you done the "oops upside your head" dance??

The Destination Wedding

Welcome to Wedding Week!! This is the week where I will completely nerd out with wedding details.

I never really disclosed a lot of information on here about the wedding except the date and the Fiance. Honestly, there was no real reason behind this. We had a short engagement (less than a year) due to my priority of moving to England. We didn't have time for "save the dates", I didn't have (or want!) a bridal shower, the people in our wedding party was a grand total of 2, and a lot of our planning was basically done on the fly!

Speaking of "on the fly" (completely natural transition here, just go with it), loads of my family had to fly from America to England for the wedding! 

So Day 1 of Wedding Week is all about the destination wedding.

My family in the USA is pretty concentrated in New York and New Jersey. My mom was really the only one to move away to Florida. So when family weddings happened, we were always the only "out of towners".

I never considered those destination weddings. They lived there. I didn't. It was as simple as that.

So I didn't think of my own wedding as a destination wedding. I live here, in England. They don't. It was the same thing, right?

Well, I'm going to say wrong, actually.

About a quarter of our ceremony guests were flying in from America. That's a lot of people to be traveling out of their way to another continent for the wedding. 

Although Alex and I didn't pick an exotic island or a mountain top to get married on, it still was about as much work and planning as those destination weddings. 

It was a lot of planning that was out of our control, as well. My procrastinator parents had to get their first ever passports (not joking... they never left the country until this month...) expedited. Some others had to renew their passports to make sure it was valid. Others booked their own hotels in different cities or had their own agendas for their time in England. And all of that was fine.

But also, it was our responsibility to keep track of these people. Who was flying in what day? Where they were staying and for how long? When could I see them?

That added to the wedding stress, not going to lie.

Do I regret any of it? Absolutely not.

But would I do anything (regarding the destination wedding aspect) differently? A million times yes.

Here are my pros and cons for having a destination wedding.

Pro - New locations are exciting!

Even if it's not a new location for you, it's just as exciting seeing the looks on your family's faces when they're sightseeing or talking a walk around town. And I felt like a professional tour guide knowing where I was going better than they did (which is pretty sad because I'm kind of clueless).

Yay, exciting rocks!

Con - Obligatory sight seeing.... 

New locations also mean obligatory sight seeing. Sure, they are there for your wedding, but they're also in a new, exciting country and want to make the most of their trip. I was able to do a lot during the week of my wedding in terms of traveling and sight seeing (which you will hear about this week). I could handle the long days, constant walking, and unexpected traveling, but it is definitely not for everyone. If you have a lot on your plate, don't do it. Make your friends and family go by themselves or do a group tour.

Pro - Vacations for your family feel like vacations for you, too!

Even though I was home here in England, my family's vacation mentality rubbed off on me. It was almost like nothing else mattered. We had a blast even if we were all just sitting in a room doing nothing. And my family is Italian; imagine "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" but with pasta. We were constantly eating, reminiscing, and having a great time.

Me and my family appearing to be causing mayhem

Con - It's easy for friends/family to commit to the idea, but not actually commit in real life.

Probably the biggest issue for several reasons.....

First of all, a lot of them ignored the RSVP date. To be honest, it doesn't sound like the worst thing in the world, but it makes things more complicated and stressful (especially when more and more guests do it). I think family try to bend the "rules" because they can; they're your family, you have to love them and deal with them.

It's easy for them to say "yes, I'm definitely coming". What's not easy is all the work after that on their part. If they let you know in advance that they can no longer make it, that's fine; there's nothing you can do about it. But don't be surprised if the week of the wedding, someone says "I'm not coming" after their spot at the wedding has already been paid for (true story... it happened to me).

Other family members, just didn't respond at all. No RSVP, no phone call, no letter, nothing. I would have settled with a Facebook message if they didn't want to spend the money on an international stamp.

Be strict. There is a difference between giving your traveling friends and family leeway and letting them walk all over you.

My advice for destination weddings or guests traveling far: Be very clear about time constraints. If you have to put it on the invite/RSVP, do it. I know I know, it may sound like a crappy thing to do, but it will be worth it. Kindly harass whoever you have to so you don't get a phone call the Sunday before the wedding with people still dropping out. (can you tell I'm angsty about that?) If travel arrangements haven't been made by a certain date, don't pay for their spot.

Obviously, only you can be the judge of that. You know your family better than I do. Maybe they're waiting for their next pay check or a better price on airfare. But also keep in mind that a few of my family members surprised me by their actions. I thought I knew them well, too. I was clearly wrong!

Con - Lot's of friends/family won't be able to come

Think about how you'd feel if certain people couldn't make it solely on the fact that it was a destination wedding. If you can't come to terms with that, then a destination wedding is not for you. I'm not saying this to be negative; I'm saying it because it's true. I went into this fulling knowing that I wouldn't have many people there from my side. None of my American friends made it to England for the wedding and only a handful of my family came. Of course I was upset, but I was prepared for it. Obviously they knew that the gesture was there; they were more than welcome to come to England and to our wedding. But I mentally prepared myself that I'd get a lot of straight up rejection.

Pro - The destination makes you happy

Hopefully you picked this destination for your wedding because it means something to you and makes you happy. It kind of makes it more like the wedding of your dreams if it's somewhere meaningful, exotic, or new. 

England was the right choice for me; it is my new home. There really wasn't another option.     

Happy! Actually I was just crying through the whole ceremony... Happy Tears!

 
Con - Some people will inevitably be upset about the location

Some people won't agree with the location. Maybe they have a good reason. Maybe (in my case) they just like to have something to complain about. 

Alex and I decided to get married in England because that's where we would be living. I had a handful of family members that I wanted at the wedding, and I knew those people would come no matter what. Of course, there were also family members that decided to put their two cents in, which really wasn't fair.

Without turning it into a long dramatic story, their argument was "you're the bride, it should be where you live." My argument was, "you're not paying for it", "you don't know what I want", and "just keep in mind, it's happening whether or not you attend".

Maybe I just have a stubborn family (duh). But keep in mind friends and family might object to a destination wedding because they can't attend for whatever reason. If they're kind about the situation, it's easy to feel bad or let it put a damper on the wedding planning. If they're kind of rude about it, it's easy to think they're being selfish and also let that put a damper on the wedding planning. So just think about how they and you approach the situation if you are having a destination wedding.

Con - International communications

Obviously, if you have a destination wedding, a lot of the planning may have to be done across time zones or continents! Keep this in mind when trying to communicate with different people in charge of your wedding. In my case, as well, some aspects were done completely blind on my part! Alex booked the wedding venue without me seeing it in person! I had to trust him and his family to make a good decision. Otherwise, we'd be screwed!

It may look like there are a lot of intense cons on the list. But if you are thinking about having a destination wedding, you obviously have a reason for it! Don't let the cons scare you away. It's obviously worth it! Every wedding has it's own little drama and stress; it's unavoidable!

Tips for destination weddings:
1. Think about guest transportation to/from the wedding. If it's in the budget, I'd definitely recommend hiring something to take them to and from the venue (especially if it would be a bunch of expensive taxis!). Select a meeting point if they aren't all at the same hotel or house. We hired a mini coach (bus) for my family which was amazing, simple, and efficient! 

2. Tell family to pre-book as much as possible when they get to the country, especially if they're traveling in large groups. Example, look into "airport vans" for when they're going home. If you have a large group (about 7 family members give or take), it's an affordable way to get to the airport/hotels around the airport together when you split the cost.

3. Look for group discounts when sightseeing. Example, look at the options for day tickets for the London Underground; they have discounted group tickets on the screens, but you have to look for them (they won't change the discount automatically if you select 4 tickets!) Another example, if you take the train into London, you get buy one get one free passes to the Tower of London (if you show your train tickets and print a voucher online).

4. Travel care packages always help! Obviously, they don't have to be sent to everyone. If you don't have the time/money, mass emails of information also do the trick! Send a group email to international guests with weather updates, if they need outlet converters (and what kind), the best way to exchange currency, addresses, phone numbers, any tips or information think they'll benefit from! It will make their life easier, and it will make YOUR life easier! (So you won't be bombarded with emails/phone calls the week of!)


Have you attended a destination wedding or a wedding that was out of your way? Would you add any pros/cons or tips to the list? What do you think about destination weddings?

Wonderful Announcement For Next Week

Hi there! Happy Friday!

So next week, I'm doing things a bit differently here at Running Across the Pond....

I'm ignoring the running part...

I'm kinda sorta ignoring the across the pond part... but not really...

Next week is all about weddings!

Yes, 5 full days about weddings.

Particularly, my wedding! But I won't get greedy, I promise. I want YOUR input, too!

You'll hear everything you want to know from my experience getting married here in the south of England! Everything from what I did the week of, how I totally almost got dropped on my head, and quirky advice on how to make things go smoothly.

I should warn you, I am/was NOT your typical bride. If you want to hear about elegant floral arrangements, Harrods gift registries (I wish!), or sparkly tiaras, don't bother looking on here!

However, if you would like to hear about the aches and pains of doing the "oops upside your head dance" on the floor in a white dress, I'm definitely your girl!

So tune in next week for a full week of wedding talk!